


Celebrations

by Lokomotiv



Series: Tony & Tony Series [10]
Category: Marvel Cinematic Universe, NCIS, The Avengers (Marvel Movies)
Genre: International Fanworks Day 2017, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-02-15
Updated: 2017-02-15
Packaged: 2018-09-24 16:55:12
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 3
Words: 3,941
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/9771992
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Lokomotiv/pseuds/Lokomotiv
Summary: Tony has a guilty pleasure. The other Tony finds out. Pleasure all around! Also, Valentine’s Day.





	1. February 13

**Author's Note:**

> Tony DiNozzo POV. Written for International Fanworks Day 2017. 
> 
> Originally, only the first and the last chapters were planned, but then I realized that the day between them was February 14, so I decided to add a mini Valentine’s Day fic as a middle chapter.

_Andy opened the door, and gasped in shock. “I need your help!” Iron Man intoned, and Andy felt his heart speed up. A superhero - his hero! - asking him for help! “Come in,” he said. Inside, a metal hand descended upon his shoulder, and luminescent mechanical eyes bore into him. “Can I trust you, Andrew?” the hero asked, and Andy nodded fervently. “I have a problem, and from what I have heard about you, I think you are the one to turn to. I need someone who is not afraid to get his hands dirty, someone discreet.” “That’s me, Iron Man,” Andy assured him, “that’s me in a nutshell!” “That’s what I thought,” the Iron-clad Man responded, approvingly. “So what’s your problem?” Andy asked. “How can I help?” “Well, you know my headquarters are not here in this city where we are right now?” “Yeah, of course.” “Now that means I will have to wear the armour until I manage to go back there, because that is where my dismantling unit is stationed.” Andy nodded again, overwhelmed by a feeling of sympathy for the man inside the armour, and the duties and responsibilities it symbolized. Admiration blossomed in his heart for this man who so faithfully guarded all of the civilians. “Tell me,” he said, breathlessly, “tell me what I can do to help.” “I am stuck in the suit, but… I have this terrible itch. Will you help me, Andy?” Iron Man turned around, and Andy gasped as a portion of the suit folded in on itself, revealing the most perfectly toned globes of ass that Andy had ever seen. “I will!” he promised, stepping forward._

Tony swallowed and suppressed the urge to glance over his shoulder. He was home, he was alone, and he was on his old work laptop that JARVIS wouldn’t dream of inhabiting. He shook himself and turned his attention back to the screen. Licking his lips, he went back to the story and started typing again. He was just getting to the good part, after all.

A few hours later he swiftly re-read the whole thing before clicking the “Post” button. With a sense of accomplishment, he powered down the laptop and considered going to bed early, with the scenes from the story still vivid in his mind. That could be fun. Or he could call his boyfriend, see if he was up for some long-distance two-person fun. He decided on the latter. Finding his phone, he pressed the button twice.

“Good evening, Agent DiNozzo,” JARVIS replied from the phone’s speaker. “How can I help you tonight?"

“Hi JARVIS, how’re you doing?"

“I am very well. Thank you for asking."

“Glad to hear it. Do you know if Tony’s very busy, or if I could talk to him? It’s not important, so I don’t want to interrupt him if he’s doing something, uh, delicate."

“Sir is, in his own words, ‘tinkering’. I believe he would appreciate your call."

“Oh all right, that’s great then! Thank you, JARVIS."

“Certainly, Agent DiNozzo. I will put you through."

A second later, JARVIS’ voice was replaced by that of his boyfriend.

“Hey, there."

“Hi. You’re ’tinkering’, I heard?"

“Yup. Either I’m actually caught up with SI work, or Pepper has just given up. I’m not actually sure either is possible, but I’m willing to pretend the first one is if that means I get to keep tinkering a little while longer."

“I was wondering if maybe you’d want to take a break? I’m in the mood for some shenanigans, maybe involving a silver snake or two? If you are in the mood too, I mean."

“Hah! I’m always in the mood for a silver snake or two with you, Tony Two. Give me one minute and I’ll shut this down."

“Okay. So. Had a good day?"

“Sure. I like it when I can take some time to just… tinker. Play around, you know?"

“Yeah."

“Okay, I’m done. Going up now. So how about you?"

“What about me? Do I like to play? You know I do."

Tony smiled at the sound of the other man’s soft laughter.

“I _do_ know you do. I meant, how was your day? You had today off, right, so what did you do? Something to put you in the mood for silver snakes, apparently."

“Nothing!"

Uh-oh, that had been absolutely the worst response possible. Too fast, too emphatic. Tony waited for the other man to call him on it, but other than a slightly longer pause than normal, his boyfriend seemed prepared to ignore it.

“Hm, okay. Sounds boring."

“I mean, just hanging around. Doing nothing. Thinking about you a lot, actually."

“And behold, silver snake mood."

“Well, naturally."

“Okay, I’m in the penthouse. Did you have any preferences?"

“Not really, you have something in mind?"

“There’s virtually no limit to the number of things in my mind involving you, me, and a couple of silver snakes."

“You pick then, all right?"

“All right!"

The slight worry Tony had felt about his earlier slip-up faded in the face of his boyfriend’s enthusiasm, and by the end of the evening he was a happily gibbering boneless mess and had forgotten about it completely.


	2. February 14

Valentine’s Day started with a 3 AM phone call, and it looked as though it would only get worse from there. Someone was kidnapping infants - tiny  _babies_ , for heaven’s sake! - and threatening to do horrible things to them if they were not paid off handsomely. In the end, no babies were hurt; the pre-school teachers who’d masterminded the entire operation had taken very good care of them, actually. The would-be perps were, not surprisingly, good with kids. Just, not so good with the kidnappings, fortunately. The case was rounded up around eleven that same night, and not until Tony was dragging himself to bed did he realize what day it was. Not feeling up to calling, trusting that his boyfriend wouldn’t feel neglected, he nevertheless figured he should at least acknowledge the date.

_Happy Valentine’s Day! (Or are you one of those people boycotting it bcz it’s a made up holiday to increase commerce?) Anyway, got a case early, wrapped it up late, so I couldn’t text you my heart before now, but here it is: <3 Love, T2_

A few seconds later, his phone buzzed with a reply.

_No, I’m one of those people who doesn’t even realize it’s Valentine’s until their boyfriends remind them. Sorry about that. <3 right back at ya! P.S. Does that mean u have tomorrow off?_

Smiling, Tony typed up his reply, and hit send.

_No worries, we make it work, remember? :D Yup, tomorrow off, gonna sleep till noon! Night_

He was asleep before the other Tony’s reply came through.

_Good night, Tony (I <3 U) too._


	3. February 15

Tony didn’t, in fact, sleep until noon. He woke up half past nine, read his boyfriend’s text from last night, and smiled. Then he got up, took a shower and made breakfast, and had just finished eating it when someone knocked on his door.

Frowning, he walked towards it. For starters, he wasn’t expecting company, and secondly, who the hell would knock instead of ringing the doorbell? Looking through the peephole, his frown deepened even more, even as he hurried to unlock and open the door.

“Wha-"

That was as far as he got in asking his boyfriend what was wrong, why he was here unexpectedly (not worrying in itself) and in the suit ( _that_ was the worrying part - last time he’d shown up out of the blue in the armour, he’d been injured), before the other man interrupted him.

“I need your help,” he said, and strode forward.

Startled, Tony stepped out of the way.

“Uh, sure."

He closed and locked the door behind them, and followed Iron Man into the living room. Before he could say anything, Iron Man stepped towards him and put a hand on his shoulder, and something about that-

“Can I trust you, Anthony?"

Realization hit and a coil of laughter started to build in his belly.

“Seriously?” he asked, feeling both a grin and heat spread across his face.

“Can I _trust_ you, Anthony?” Iron Man repeated, voice graver than Tony had ever heard it before.

“Yeah, uh. Yes,” he said, and if some laughter escaped with the words, nobody seemed to mind.

“I have a problem, and from what I have heard about you, I think you are the one to turn to. I need someone who is not afraid to get his hands dirty, someone discreet.”

Tony racked his brain for what came next in the (painfully bad) dialogue. That had seriously not been his best work, but it was pretty much only meant as a lead-up to the porn, so he hadn’t been bothered about it. Not until his boyfriend had not only gone and read it, but apparently _memorized_ it, too. The porn part of the fic he remembered clear as day, though. Figures.

“Um, that’s me in a nutshell, Iron Man!"

“That’s what I thought."

The silence told him it was his line. Something about… yeah. Good thing pretty much all of Andy’s lines had been fillers.

“So, how can I help?"

“Well, you know my headquarters are not here in this city where we are right now?”

Tony winced at hearing that line out loud. He was _so_ going to start to pay more attention to the lead-up. But he couldn’t stop grinning.

“Ah, ouch, yikes. I mean, yes."

“Now that means I will have to wear the armour until I manage to go back there, because that is where my dismantling unit is stationed.”

“Yeah. Uh. You poor, poor thing? No, wait. What can I do to help? No, wait,  _tell me!_ _Tell me_ what I can do to help."

Tony did his best to sound breathless and serious, but he wasn’t sure how well he was doing with that.

“I am stuck in the suit, but... I have this terrible itch."

Well, now they were getting somewhere! It suddenly occurred to him to wonder how his boyfriend would handle the suit’s part in the porn, but he decided to just wait and find out.

"Will you help me, Tony?” Iron Man asked, and turned around.

And then, the suit did, in fact, _really_ fold in on itself. Ho. Ly. _Crap!_  And the other Tony’s ass was in fact, revealed, gloriously naked, just like in the story. Tony tried to appreciate the view from where he was bent double, howling with laughter. The other man didn’t prompt him this time, probably knew it would be pointless. Iron Man just stood there, bare-assed and waiting patiently for Tony to calm down. (That thought really didn’t help with the calming down part.) Finally though, Tony thought he had a handle on it. He wiped tears from his eyes and stepped forward.

“I, I will,” he hiccuped. “Oh, I will. I promise."

Luckily, the rest of the fic could be enacted without much dialogue. Tony found out that it was somewhat problematic to successfully rim some to completion while still occasionally being overwhelmed by bouts of laughter, but he did his best, and thankfully he’d had Andy use his fingers as well. He knew from the sounds his boyfriend was making that the suit’s face-plate was up, even though that wasn’t in the story. Hearing the familiar unfiltered gasps and encouragements was how Tony could tell that the other man was truly enjoying himself, which was good, because otherwise he might at this point have started worrying how much of this was purely for his own benefit, and then he probably wouldn’t have enjoyed it as much as he was doing. As the older man drew closer to the edge, Tony rubbed his fingers against his prostate again and again, and just as he could feel his boyfriend reach the tipping point, he bit down, hard, in the flesh of one of his buttocks. The older Tony shouted as he came, and Tony smiled around his bite, not letting go immediately, even as he pulled his fingers out. That last part hadn’t been in the script either, but improvisation was always good, right?

When he finally did let go, he licked the red mark he’d left while the other Tony caught his breath. After a few moments of silence and stillness, Tony heard the soft whir of the face-plate descending, and smiled again, nuzzling the butt before him with his face. Time for act two.

“Thank you, Tony,” Iron Man said. “You have been of great help to me. If there is anything I can do for you in return, just let me know."

Thank _God_ Andy’s lines were all fillers, no way in hell would Tony be able to get it right with his brains as scrambled as they were. He just mumbled something he didn’t even understand himself into the soft flesh under his mouth. Then he kissed it again.

“I can see you have an itch of your own, Tony.”

That was a lie. In the fic, Andy had gotten up and Iron Man had turned around, but here, now, Iron Man was still looking in the other direction. No way could he see Tony and his itch. Tony let out a sound that he later would have to admit was… yes. A giggle. A strange sound followed, which Tony would later realize was the other Tony laughing through Iron Man’s voice modulation.

“Don’t be embarrassed. This type of itch is notoriously contagious. Will you let me help you? Please?"

Tony nodded, rubbing his face against the warm skin he was still nuzzling into. He knew what would happen next, so he didn’t protest with more than a soft whine when his butt-pillow disappeared and he was manhandled to lie face-down, bent over the back of his living-room sofa. After the skin of his boyfriend’s buttocks, the leather felt awfully cold and stiff against his face, so he focused instead on the hands pulling his pants down, and the mechanic fingers working him open. He whined again as they pulled out, but was soon compensated by the sight of Iron Man and his ( _OMG!_ ) Iron Member right in front of his face.

“The metal has to go somewhere when I open up in the back, and this is the most efficient way to stack it."

Tony laughed out loud as he remembered writing that line to explain why the armour suddenly had a dick. He’d grimaced even as he wrote it, knowing the other Tony would have scoffed at the technical inaccuracy, and now the other man had gone and actually  _said_ it.

“Open up,” Iron Man said, tapping him gently on the chin.

Tony obediently took as much of the Iron Dick into his mouth as he could, coating it with saliva. In the story, that had been the only lubricant, but Tony had felt his boyfriend add something more useful as he’d fingered him open. Iron Man withdrew and returned to the other side of the couch.

“Brace yourself,” he said, and Tony laughed again, a bit breathlessly with how he was suddenly impaled to the hilt on the Iron Cock.

“Fuck yeah!” he couldn’t help but shout, the only line of Andy’s he could remember at the moment.

Tony didn’t last long, partly because of the lingering awesomeness of act one, partly because of the ongoing brilliance of act two pounding into him, and partly because his boyfriend also decided to go off script by adding a tight grip on Tony’s butt, holding him wide open as he fucked him. Tony could feel the pressure of each individual finger along the outer side of each buttock, and the thumbs, right there next to his asshole. The pressure was just across the edge of painful, perfect, and it would bruise beautifully; the thought of those marks helped pushing him to completion faster than he’d expected.

As usual, Tony was pretty conked out after the brilliant sex. Iron Man carried him to bed, and maybe he would be embarrassed when he woke up to realize he’d been put to bed like a toddler, but at the moment? He just felt safe, warm, content. As he was gently placed on the mattress, he tried to rouse himself, but the other Tony - face-plate up, now - shushed him and told him to get some sleep.

“You’ll stay?” he asked, looking up at the older man.

“I’ll stay. I’ll just… slip into something more comfortable, as it were."

Tony grinned even as he closed his eyes. He intended to respond, he really did, but he drifted off before he could.

When Tony woke up, his face was snuggled into the other Tony’s side. It took a few moments, then Tony remembered what had happened. He sat bolt upright, staring at the older man who, other than looking mildly startled by the sudden movement, was lying there doing something on his tablet, acting like nothing out of the ordinary had happened.

“You!” Tony said, pointing at the other man. “You."

“Me,” the other Tony readily agreed.

Well, okay. Now that _that_ was established, Tony sank back into bed, cuddling into his boyfriend’s side again. He felt his face heat up (because seriously, what self-respecting adult male writes porny fan fiction about his own boyfriend?), and hid it against the other man’s shoulder, grinning delightedly (because also: writing porny fan fiction about his own boyfriend? Turned out _awesome!_ ). His boyfriend’s hand settled on the back of his head, petting softly.

“You read my… stuff."

“Yup."

“Well, that’s embarrassing. Also hot. But embarrassing. How did you even-"

“JARVIS."

“Of course."

Tony laughed out loud, suddenly, sitting up straight as he thought back to earlier. The other Tony looked at him, grinning.

“You actually built a butt-flap into the suit. Holy shit, that’s absolutely priceless! Assuming of course that the suit hasn’t always had back-door access?"

“Nope, completely based upon your literary masterpiece, so aptly named 'The Contagious Itch'."

“Ah, yes, titles. Not my strong suit."

“Neither is dialogue, if I'm brutally honest.”

Tony just smiled sheepishly and shrugged. What could he say?

"The porn though? Positively inspired. Butt access through the suit, honestly don’t know why I’ve never thought of that myself. It’s brilliant."

“Why, thank you. Also: thank you. For the whole thing. It was… fun."

“It was, wasn’t it?”

They sat in silence, just grinning at each other, longer than either of them probably wanted to admit.

“Two things though,” the older man finally said.

“Uh-huh?"

“Not being able to get out the the armour without the dismantling unit? That was like, Mark _IV_. That’s practically an antique by now."

“It was for the armour butt-flap! In pursuit of the armour butt-flap, I claim poetic licence!"

“All right, agreed. Second: the biting?"

“Inspiration struck. I _am_ an artist, after all. Besides, you did your own bit of improv with the-"

Tony made grabby hands to illustrate.

“Well, you started it. Are you going to edit it in?"

“Maybe. It _was_ very hot. Both the biting and the-“

The older man laughed silently as Tony made the grabby hands again.

“It was."

Something occurred to Tony then.

“Hey, it doesn’t bug you, does it? That I write fan fiction about you? I probably should have told you sooner, but… I was a bit embarrassed."

“Was?"

“Well, you don’t seem to think less of me for doing it. And the cat’s out of the bag now, so not really a point in hiding it anymore, anyway. But really, are you okay with it?"

“Um, about that, maybe now is the time to tell you that it’s on the list? Our list."

It took Tony maybe a second to realize what that meant.

“Wait what, you write fan fiction?"

“Yup. For years now."

“That’s awesome! Which fandoms?"

“Uh, well. Hm. Iron Man?"

That startled a laugh out of Tony; the other Tony just smiled.

“Seriously, you write fan fiction about yourself? Isn’t that a little, I don’t know?"

“Well, it seems to me that a lot of people write about themselves in one way or another, _Andy_."

“Yeah, all right. Point."

“Besides, if everybody else gets to write about me what they want me to do in relation to everybody else, I should be allowed to write about what I think everybody else and what they should do in relation to me."

“So have I read anything by you, what’s your pseud?"

The older man reached for the tablet, tapped and swiped a couple of times, and then turned it so that Tony could see what was on it.

“‘IAmIronMan_ForRealsies'? For _realsies?_ "

“Someone had already snagged IAmIronMan. Seriously, this was just days after that first press conference, how did they even know there would be an Iron Man fandom?"

“Uh, I think ’they’ are the ones who _created_ the Iron Man fandom? And you’re one of ’them', apparently.”

Having looked through the (considerable) list of works, Tony added

“And yes, I’ve read some of your stuff, a while back. It’s good. Better than mine."

“Eh. Relative. You have the inspired porn. And trust me, when _I_ consider it inspired, it’s _inspired_."

“Well, I’ve got an inspiring sex life. You should know, you’re it."

"You know who else we know who writes Iron Man fanfic?"

“Euhm… Thor? No, wait, Steve! Please tell me it’s Steve?"

“JARVIS."

“ _What?_ "

“Yup. He thinks he’s sneaky about it, but I know."

“Oh my God, that’s… that's  _adorable!_ Is he any good?"

“Better than you and me combined. He’s got like over a thousand user subscriptions. Part of that is that he publishes a full fic pretty much every week, so it adds up, but mostly, it’s just that he writes really good stuff."

“That’s so cool. You must be really proud of him."

The older Tony didn’t respond to that immediately, just looked at Tony, smiling, something very soft in his eyes. Tony took the opportunity to snuggle back into his boyfriend’s side.

“I am,” his boyfriend finally said. “I would be proud of him writing fanfic even if he didn’t have a single user subscription."

“Yeah, I know. I’m proud too, not _of_ him of course, because I have nothing to do with why he is the way he his. But… I’m proud to know him, you know? You make the coolest things."

Tony slowly placed a hand on the reactor in the other man’s chest, and was relieved when the other man didn’t tense at the touch. He tapped it gently.

"I mean, even your narcissistic fan fiction is awesome,” he added, lightly.

Tony felt more than heard his boyfriend’s laughter at that.

“I’m proud to know you too, Tony too. In spite of your crappy fan fiction."

“Hey!"

“It’s just the porn saving you from it dragging you down completely, really."

“You’re the one who decided _memorizing_ the crappy dialogue was a good idea!"

“Hell no, I had JARVIS feed me the lines one by one on the HUD, and I tried very hard not to actually listen to what I was saying."

“Oh. Yeah, makes sense."

“But no, seriously, I love your crappy dialogue. It gives the stories exactly the right tacky feeling. I particularly liked the way you slipped up and wrote Tony instead of Andy in a couple of places."

“Shit, really?"

“Really. Can’t wait for the next instalment."

“Yeah, yeah,” Tony grumbled. “You just like me for my porn."

“That, and a couple of other things."

“Happy International Fanworks Day, by the way."

“Right back at ya, Tony Two."

**Author's Note:**

> Happy International Fanworks Day everybody!


End file.
